i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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