I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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