she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
