I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
