I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
