I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
honey bunches of taint.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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