U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
