I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
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