fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
