There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
She even gives head with a lisp.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
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