all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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