no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
