You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
