i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
