Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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