i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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