He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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