Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
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