there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I just got carded by a ten year old.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize
