My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
