omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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