she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
