he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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