do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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