office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize