Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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