She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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