I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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