Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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