We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
