you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
