I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
