you win again, gameday.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize
