I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
