I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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