u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
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