have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
We just shotgunned beers for America
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
