guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
