every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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