I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
