i don't plan on having that self control this summer
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
We have started to decorate penises.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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