The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Plan B is the new Plan A
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
She bit a glass in half.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
