Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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