He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize