you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
