R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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