we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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