xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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