Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize