if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
